Hermana Miller

On Sunday Pedro wore a white shirt and tie. He blessed the sacrament. He was really nervous, but did really well. It was cool to see him and Gilberto, a re-activating less active blessing the sacrament together. Another cool thing that happened on Sunday? The first Sunday in my entire mission I didn't play piano! It was so strange! A new American family decided to come to our ward, instead of the English ward, and now we have a young men's president (finally!), and a pianist for sacrament meeting! It is an exciting development. But now I don't know what to do during church...sit with members, I guess. It was so strange not sitting in my seat.

There are still ants on my pillow. I woke up with one on my FACE the other day (ew.).

I attached a picture of us with an Elder in our mission. He just started about 3 transfers ago and guess what!? Looking through the Liahona one day, I saw a picture of him. Later, I showed it to him, and he confirmed it was him! It was so exciting, we got him to sign our copies of the Liahona at Zone Conference. He was pleased to do it. He is from England. Wow! What a story. :)

We had a cool experience two Sundays ago that I forgot to mention. Due to various circumstances beyond my control, we were quite behind on contacts, and since we turn in numbers on Sunday, it's the day to catch up. We were also had three lessons to teach (which is a daily goal, anyway). Some missionaries hand out pass-along cards and call it a contact. Sister Summers and I don't believe in that. It would have been easy to get the numbers that way, but instead, we decided to walk the neighborhood and talk to people in the street and go to a parking lot as a last resort. We were blessed. Not only did we get a few street lessons (where we teach a contact right when we find him), we also met some cool people. As we walked home, the last person we saw also turned out to be the last contact we needed to meet our goal. We were truly blessed for doing Heavenly Father's work the best that we knew how. I know that when we put in our part, He puts in His. I have seen that manifest throughout my mission. From funny "coincidences," to following "silly thoughts" that end up being spiritual promptings, God's hand has truly been very active in my life the past 18 months. I know that it's not just because I'm a missionary, but because I'm doing those things God expects us to do if we want His spirit to be with us. Looking back, I realize I have:

1. prayed and looked for the Lord's will;

2. studied the scriptures for an hour daily;

3. written my spiritual experiences in my journal; and

4. learned about and applied the doctrine of the sacrament (still working on this one).

You may or may not recall that this is the list of things President Martineau said we needed to do to have the spirit with us and receive revelation daily (plus temple attendance). I know that every one has the right to the spirit and that we can all have him as a constant companion...missionary and civilian alike.

I love the gospel. I love the scriptures. I love my Heavenly Father. I know the gospel is true. I know the Book of Mormon is the word of God. I love that book. I know we are all children of a loving Heavenly Father, and He has a plan for all of us. Sometimes it is hard to realize (identify) or accept His will, but when we do, we can be truly happy. I know Joseph Smith was a prophet of God, and that the church of Jesus Christ was restored through him, along with Christ's authority and all necessary saving ordinances and the pure doctrine of Christ. Jesus Christ is my Savior and I know that only though His true church can we take full advantage of His expiatory sacrifice and return to His and our Heavenly Father's presence to live forever with our families. I am so grateful for this knowledge and for your constant support through my experience in Puerto Rico.

I love you!

Love,

Hermana Miller

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571: Also, we caught a little lizard one day and took some pictures. It was teeny-tiny! Sooo cute!

590: This is a little girl in our ward. Do your remember Darla from Finding Nemo? All the animals are scared of her? She is kind of like that. She also has lots of animals, which is ironic. This is one of her recent acquisitions, a little chick. I fear for her (the chick). It was so soft and fluffy! I am really red in this picture because I did not protect myself from the sun that day and then we went on a nice stroll for a couple hours to talk to people. It was sunny outside!

Dear Family,

Zone conference was great. Sister Summers and I really prepared for it well, I think. It was interesting, because although it took us a month, on Monday while telling her about what I learned in personal study, I finally realized that the conversion pattern is really just the gospel of Jesus Christ. The steps that every one takes in their conversion is (first desire, then) faith, repentance, and then some sort of covenant-making event. Then, they all want to go and share it with every one. We were just so excited when we finally came to that realization, we were practically jumping for joy. We felt ridiculous, because it seems so simple, but we felt more ridiculous when, later, we found that it says just that in True to the Faith. I don't know how many times I've read the entry on conversion in that book and in the Bible dictionary, but they both mention both conversion and the gospel of Jesus Christ, but I never really put it together or completely understood before. I am grateful for the opportunity we all had to really study and learn about conversion. I know that I have come to understand and know Heavenly Father better through this process; because conversion is the process whereby we can come to know Heavenly Father and prepare to return to him (the gospel of Jesus Christ!). It was a wonderful learning exercise.

This week in Guaynabo has been typical. We are looking for an apartment and have done a lot of contacting while searching. Unfortunately, a less-active practically asked us to not visit her anymore after zone conference, which was really disappointing. In spite of this, I know that there are other less actives who are progressing. We went last night to visit Ida and she let us in and told us that she likes to read the Book of Mormon at work, when she can. I think she really has a testimony, but that she just doesn't come to church consistently because of a little bit of laziness. She works at 2 on Sunday, and so she says that she has to run out really fast to make it to work on time, so she doesn't always come; and that she is tired a lot of Sunday mornings. We have real hope for her though, because it is apparent she has a testimony, and however weak it may be, we can help her.

I am grateful for the opportunity I have had as a missionary and love helping people come to know about and understand the gospel. I love Jesus Christ and the Book of Mormon, and I know that it is true. I know that this is the church of Jesus Christ, the only true and living church on the earth.

Love,

We found a new less active this week, Iris. She was happy that we came (which is a different response than usual). I feel like she was waiting for us. She has a daughter who is having some major problems right now, and was so relieved that we had come to find her and that we could pray with her. She committed to come to church when we invited her and even confessed that she currently attends the neighborhood branch of Discipulos de Cristo. She (as do most less actives) asked about Sylvia. I am very impressed with all the wonderful service Hermana Sierra has done in this ward. Everyone knows and loves her. She is a wonderful example.

Also, I have seen wonderful improvements in Pedro and Rafaela since he was baptized. I am so happy to see the benefits of following Christ's example through this couple. They came to church for the full 3 hours on Sunday for the first time since I've been here, and they said they loved it. There is an increased love in their relationship and a greater measure of the spirit in their home. I love them and am very excited for this new path they are starting down together.

I have been studying conversion for the last month. It is very interesting, and I see a consistent pattern in nearly all the stories, though manifested in different ways. I have studied several, including: Nephi; Enos; Lamoni; Paul; Zeezrom; Amulek; Lamanites and Nephite dissenters in Helaman 5; Ethiopian Eunuch; and Cornelius. The list to study is a lot longer; there are tons of conversion stories in the scriptures! Also, in connection with Zeezrom I studied Korihor (one of my favorite stories in the Book of Mormon) as a comparison exercise. Along with Korihor I was able to study the stories of Nehor and Sherem as well. It was interesting to see the commonalities between those who were converted and those who were not converted. Some major themes I have observed are the following:

1. Desire. Everyone has the desire to come unto Christ and to know the truth. Like I mentioned above, every one's desire is manifest in a distinct manner, but all of them have a true desire to do right. For example: today I studied Paul. Saul was a well-trained Jew and a strict Pharisee. I think he honestly thought he was doing right in breaking down Christianity, because as soon as he realized he as doing wrong, he changed. I read the scripture in John 16:2 which says that many who would break down the gospel would think they were doing God a service. I think Saul was one in this category, because as soon as he realized he was wrong, he re-directed his course and then continued zealously fighting for the cause that he believed in. Because he had the innate desire to do what was right, he was responsive to the invitation to act.

2. Agency. All the stories I have studied underline the importance of agency in God's eternal plan. Every single convert had been invited to act before his complete conversion. For example: today I studied in Helaman 5 when Nephi and Lehi were in prison with the Lamanites and Nephite dissenters. When they asked what they were to do, Aminidab told them to pray until they had faith in Christ. They responded and the cloud of doubt and skepticism represented by the smoky atmosphere was removed from their minds and spirits. It was especially interesting for me that they had to act until they received a response.

3. Perseverance. Many of the conversion experiences were fast, and others took a while, but what is common in all of them is the convert's perseverance in looking for and receiving an answer. After time of truly looking for what was right, they were finally able to receive, or perhaps recognize the response. A wonderful example of this is above from Helaman 5, or also in Enos. We learn that Enos prayed all day and into the night. I don't think that the lesson in this story is that we need to get onto our knees and pray until we get a response. Maybe...but for me, the lesson is more that we continue praying, through the days, months, and years until we get a response. It is such an important pattern, because although we would all like to see an angel and just know without effort, where is the growth in that? What's more, where is the exercise of agency?

4. Covenants. After finding out for themselves, everyone has a desire to make covenants with God, to show their love for and dedication to Him. My favorite example of this is that of the Ethiopian Eunuch. I love what he says to Phillip after they learn together from the scriptures about Christ: "And as they went on their way, they came unto a certain water: and the eunuch said, See, here is water; what doth hinder me to be baptized?" He had that desire to make a covenant and then acted according to his desire and was baptized.

5. Sharing. After finding their happiness in the gospel and through covenant making, they have the desire to go on and share their experience with others. It is a completely irrepressible joy to participate in the conversion of others.

There is so much more I have learned in these past couple weeks, such as humility; obedience; the role of others in the conversion process; the role of the atonement; etc. I have absolutely loved this assignment, and I feel like I have grown and learned so much by doing an intensive study of several related stories. You should do it to! Then, you can bore people on your blog as you discuss what you've learned instead of talking about what you did all week...(I don't remember what we did all week!).

I love you,

Hermana Miller

Note on the picture: I don't know if I've ever sent a picture of the cockroaches they have here, but we had a HUGE one this week. This is us being a daring and picking up the corpse with a piece of toilet paper and taking pictures. (Raid is very powerful, by-the-way: it kills on the spot). They have wings and are ugly.

After the baptism, a member invited us to Dunkin' Donuts for a donut and hot chocolate...so we went! This is a picture of our adventure there. We, being the only girls in the group, sat at the reject table (all alone), but it turned out we had more fun, because who wants to talk to boys anyways?

In other exciting news: Olga, the less active who is progressing has taken yet another step towards the temple! She has drunk coffee for a long time, and was slowly trying to quit. She went on a cruise a couple months ago and completely quit. When she came back, she didn't drink it again for another couple weeks, but then picked it up again because she makes it for other people (she feeds homeless people that walk by her house and also, she made it for workers in her house). We talked about taking it from her, and she thought we were joking and vaguely committed to put it in her father's home. When we came back this week, we brought a box and she gave it to us! So, she is completely coffee free now! She is really progressing a lot and it is very exciting. Here is a picture of us with the coffee maker outside our house when we got home that night. We were happy and made silly faces.

Also, I keep finding ants on my bed. I know that is very strange, and it is not like there are a lot of them, but there are just a few here and there. For example, at any one time, perhaps about 5-7. They don't bite or anything, but come on...who wants to sleep with ants? We changed our laundry detergent, so perhaps it is a sweeter laundry detergent. I woke up one day and there was one one my eyebrow, and I thought it was a piece of hair. I prefer to not be touched by bugs.

Lastly, we stopped at some of my favorite graffiti this week to take a picture of it. That is also attached, as is a picture of our dog, Sweetie. :) I love her. She is so cute.

Thank you for your love and support!

Love,

Hermana Miller

Dear Family,

Once again, this has been a fairly uneventful week. I doubt Puerto Rico has gotten less exciting, I think I have just become less excitable. I really feel like there are no surprises any more, and I just work.

I should note however, the interesting man we met outside the train station yesterday. His name was Wilfredo. Once we got talking, we found out he had visited the church before and had possibly been baptized. As we continued talking however, we came to find out why he no longer attends church. When asked whether he still reads in the Book of Mormon or not, he promptly replied that he "delivered" that to one of the ex-bishops. "Why is that?" I replied, and received an answer that was fairly entertaining. The ex-bishop was a member of the FBI, and Wilfredo said that he was being helped by him (it seems the FBI stole his identity and gave it to a criminal or something). He says that he doesn't read the Bible or the Book of Mormon anymore because that is how the CIA and FBI can track us, and they do it using radio waves. I'm not really sure what we said, but we were able to escape without any problem. Sometimes I wonder if people actually believe the things they tell us, or if they just do it for kicks and giggles, to see how we respond...or to give us a good story. Although he seemed fairly normal, I'm pretty sure he genuinely believed what he was saying.

In other news, we are still teaching people.... Every day. We've been able to talk to lots and share the gospel with them. Unfortunately, Saima seems to be avoiding us (a great disappointment since she was genuinely cool), and Wanda called us today to tell us she had made a decision (about whether to...I don't know, listen to us? Come to church? Be baptized?), and that decision is no. So, we don't get to visit her anymore. I don't think I've ever had someone call me to break up with us. It is a Puerto-Rican first, and we were a little surprised. Usually people just avoid us (see above, Saima). So, basically, we are back to looking for new people to teach, and have even resorted to searching for more less actives to teach. There seem to be a lot, so that is a fairly bottom-less pit...I mean pool...teaching pool.

It has been very sunny all week, which is good for my tan. haha. Like I tan. I don't seem to be burning any more though, even though I don't apply sunscreen any longer (yuck, I'm sick of the stuff). I may come back with skin cancer, but I won't smell like a trip to the beach anymore. In fact, I smell like vanilla now because a couple weeks ago I bought some more perfume (I left mine at home with the fear that the bugs would attack me, but as it turns out, they attacked me without the perfume anyway, so I thought I would start using it again, and smell pretty.). It is the same scent I used before I left, so it reminds me of Indiana when I put it on, which is interesting. Isn't it interesting how smells and sounds/music can take you back in time? I love that.

I know this letter has been rather boring and non-missionary-ish, I'm just a little disappointed in our recent set-backs and would rather focus on my new perfume and our funny contacts.

Okay, here is a good story...I guess. A classic "we were led by the Lord" story. We went to look for a less active one day who hardly ever opens her door, and who is hardly never home, but we were completely out of back-up plans (we make about 5 back-up back-up plans for the last hour of the day, because it always seems no one is available), so we went looking for her. In the elevator up to her house, we met a lady who has a Book of Mormon in her house and wants to start learning more about it again. It was exciting because we could set a cita and we're going to teach her more about the Book of Mormon. yay! That was a fun time.

We also found a less active in her home who we haven't been able to teach for a long time. In fact, Hermana Comoletti never even met her, so that was a true miracle too. Additionally, two less actives made it to church on Sunday, even though one, in response to our lesson about keeping the Sabbath Day holy recently told us that "It is important to keep the commandments and all, but you have to keep a balance, you know?" I don't know. It seems to me that you keep the commandments or you don't, but perhaps that is why she is less active...she doesn't understand that. We shared the story of Naaman with her yesterday, and talked about how all commandments are important, and how we have to keep them 100%...if Naaman hadn't washed himself a full 7 times in the water, he would not have been cleansed. It was a good lesson, although I don't think she fully understood (she chooses to misunderstand). But, we were really happy that two of them could make it to church on Sunday. Yay!

Thanks for the letters and support. I love you all!

Love,j

Hermana Miller.

It is the first day of just another transfer in the life of Hermana Miller. But, it also happens to be the first day of the last transfer in the life of Hermana Miller. How strange it feels. I never thought this time would come, but here I am at the beginning of the end.

Yet again, my companion has been changed on me. Hermana Comoletti and I just had too much fun together, so they took her away and I am working with...Hermana Summers! Again! It was very surprising and exciting. We worked together two transfers ago for a couple weeks, and it was a good experience. So, it will be cool to have 6 more weeks with her. (By-the-way...I don't want you to read too much into "[We] just had too much fun together." There is no rule-breaking involved here.... It just always seems that the people I like are taken away so fast. Sad.).

It has been a really great transfer with her. I think I grew the most in this last transfer, and learned a lot and strengthed a lot. It was a really wonderful experience. She taught me a lot, and we got a lot of good work done. We have two investigators now!

Wanda: She couldn't come to church because we had a Regional/Stake Conference thing (the satellite stake conference ones), and she was sick, but she is still letting us come over and we are still working with her. She seems very sincere and real. She is honestly looking for an answer and we are just trying to help her recognize it.

Saima: She is a new-ish one who is pretty cool. We were just neighborhood walking the other week and ran into her and we taught a first lesson. She wasn't there for the return cita, but we went back another day and she was there. She let us in and we shared something. She is studying to be baptized in another church, but has read a little in the Book of Mormon and says she likes it because she can understand it and becaue it seems to teach the same sort of concepts/doctrine that the Bible teaches. She has two little kids who are really cute, one in 2nd grade and one in Kindergarten.

Two less actives came to the Stake conference, which was very exciting for us. Having Less actives come to church is just as exciting as having investigators in church, because you work just as hard with them, and it is good to see them where they belong, doing what they need to be doing.

I am excited to keep working here in Guaynabo and to work with Hermana Summers again too. I love you all. Thanks for your support!

Love,

Hermana Miller

0296: This is Sweetie, our dog. We were afraid she was going to die, so we took some pictures. She is still alive though, but I think she'll die soon enough. She is so cute (personality, not body...). She loves us.

0305: Hermana Comoletti and I have the same shoes! It was funny when we discovered that. Which ones do you think are mine?

0324: One of Hermana Comoletti's friends is serving in the NYC mission and sent her this shirt. So, we took a picture. She is standing on a chair next to me.

0339: This is one of our favorite look-out places. Do you see the ocean in the background? I know I send you one of these with every companion I have...but it is a cool spot!

Dear Family,

There is not a lot of new and exciting things going on; we are just kind of for more people to teach and sharing the gospel with everyone! It is fun.

We are still working with Wanda, a really great investigator who has a son. She is really reading and praying and has a lot of hard questions. I think she really wants to know, but at the same time, she is not looking to feel the spirit, she is looking to understand logically. It is hard because she has a Pentecostal background and sees that as truth, because that is what she knows. The wonderful thing is that she knows how to pray, and we are really happy about that. She says she really is praying to see if this is what the Lord wants for her life. We really want her to come to church, but two things have come up these past two Sundays, so she hasn't been able to. I know that coming to church can really her answer, so we are really going to work on that this week, along with how the feel and recognize the spirit. I'm excited to work with her.

After all the less-active confessions these last couple weeks, we have now had a lot of them avoiding us, which is fairly frustrating, but we are still looking for them to try to work with them.

We are also studying the character of God and the conversion process, in preparation for a zone conference at the beginning of February. I am learning a ton; I just finished reading the Book of Mormon again, and so I am just studying Nephi's conversion story right now, and it is really very interesting. It is interesting to see how his conversion and the character of God are strongly related. I love the scriptures!

Thanks for your love and support.

Sincerely,
Hermana Miller

Today is emergency p-day. Not because there is an emergency, just because they want to do interviews tomorrow, so we are p-daying it today. Surprise!

This week has been good. We made it to 2011! I can't believe it is already January. We tried to go and buy Chinese food on New Year's Eve, but everything was closed, so we ate Chinese food yesterday in commemoration of the new year. It was fun.

We were able to visit Wanda again this week a couple times and she is doing really well. She read in the Book of Mormon and has good questions. Her number one doubt is whether or not Joseph Smith could have seen God the Father. We told her to pray about it and also to pray to know if the Book of Mormon is true. She is really really sweet and her son is really awesome; we got to meet him this week. He is not your average kid. He really likes church things and is really calm and super sweet. We are really excited for her and how she is progressing. She was going to come to church, she said, but it was raining a lot on Sunday, so she didn't come. I really think she'll come to church next week.

On SUnday we went walking for a while to be able to talk to people and we decided to start heading home because it was starting to get dark. On the way there, we ran into the Elders who were with some members from another ward on an exchange. It was one of our Elders with another guy and another girl. The girl is really cool; she just got baptized last March and always goes out with the missionaries and is just very active. Apparently they were calling all the missionaries in the Metro area and nobody was answering and then when they called the Elders they were like, "Is this a joke?" because it was 3 young adults wanting to go on splits with the missionaries. It was cool that we ran into them though because then the girl came with us and we had two really cool visits with her.

First we went to Karina's house and they clicked really fast, because we told Karina that Victoria was a recent convert too and that was really a bonding point for her. Victoria testified of the blessing of the Holy Ghost and of the Sacrament and then Karina was asking about the best way to share the gospel with her family. It was a really cool experience, because it took us months for Karina to feel that comfortable with us, but with this new member, it was instantaneous.

Next we went to Karem's house. Karem is the daughter of the second Counselor in the Bishopric and doesn't really like us and never lets us in without an appointment, but is never there for appointments. We haven't even tried to contact her in a couple months (I don't think Hermana Beltran ever met her), but when we knocked on her door and she saw us, she let us right in. We hadn't planned anything, because we were planning on just saying hi, so we were really surprised when we just got right in, but we had a really good lesson about "The three Rs of Choice" by President Monson and Victoria shared a wonderful testimony again. I think she is a better missionary than we are.

Later on, the Elders called us and told us about their experiences and both of them had really good experiences too. I know that coincidences don't happen but that Heavenly Father arranges everything for us so that as tools in His hands we can bless His children in our areas. It was interesting to see that all three groups had great experiences. I love it when things like that happen that just help us to see the hand of God in His work.

I love you. I hope you have a great week.

Love,

Hermana Miller

0277: These are the missionaries in our ward. We went over to the Kay's house to eat on Sunday and then we sang some hymns, and this is Elder Wouden's last picture. He is the one next to me. Guess what? He is from South Jordan, UT! He also has a 16 year old sister in Bingham, so maybe she and Tyler know each other. He is going home this Saturday. It is always really weird to see missionaries leave. He and I have been in the same ward since August, so now I am teh only remaining one of the original four...those of us who opened the ward again to missionary work. How strange. Also...my companion is not that tall. She is standing on the couch behind me. Yeah. She is that short.

0273: This is us with the Kays. They have two little girls. Sylvia is the big on and Vivian is the little one. They are a really nice family. (Ben Kay is from Buffalo Stake)

0269: This is another orchid that came out today. I know flower pictures aren't really that exciting, I just think the environment we live in is quite exotic and different.